Saturday, August 21, 2010

BG&I Golf Open

The first annual BG and I Open (Ben Gay and Ibuprofen Golf Open) is officially over.  You won't see much coverage on ESPN or any the greater South Haven media outlets, but it happened ... and I was there.  There to pay witness to what might have been the single most important golf event of the year, was yours truly.  Connoisseur of this test of man verses the sculpted landscape of 9 of the most challenging holes of in all the golf world (at least they were today).  Some holes so tough you couldn't even pound a tee into the granite-like soil.  A course for real men.  And real women.  32 of South Haven's, some would say, finest summer citizens.

A peek at the pre-tournament field indicated that there were indeed several classic 'ringers'.  Disguised maybe as carpenters or paper industry workers, these guys somehow slipped into the field of hackers and wannabes.  These 'ringers' quickly surfaced on the first tee ... booming their drives into the morning haze as their partners whacked, hacked, and whiffed their way on to the first fairway.  It was going to be a long day.

As the tournament bore on, it quickly became apparent that the wise perpetrator (perp) of this event had balanced the teams up pretty well by forcing the 'ringers' the numbing opportunity to play with hacks like me.  We hacks actually serve a great purpose on the golf course as we tend to slow the game down to more of a gentleman's pace.  None of this one-hour forty-five minutes for 9 holes for the likes of us but the more genteel pace of say maybe 2 1/2 to 3 hours.   We hacks have discovered that golf is more like fine wine as it is enjoyed best by sipping slowly and savoring each glass.  Conversation and tormenting your partners is what the game is really about; not precision athleticism.

As the morning heated up, it and our back muscles began to throb like the beat of a rap song, the last hole came into view.  Oh merciful one, I thought.  The end is near.  The pain will soon be soothed by a frosty cold one in the clubhouse.  So as the round ended in a blaze of forgettable glory, we limped into bar to tally our scores.  Looking around it was apparent that many were putting on a good front to hide the pain and agony of defeat.  Laughing and joking around could not cover up the sight of this senior group (except for those 'ringers') of golfers as they gingerly eased themselves into their chairs and you could hear our collective sigh of relief that the game was finally over.  All winners .. just because they finished the round and as in most sporting events ... the best teams really did win.  So the combination of hackers and ringers worked out pretty good.  Strength and weakness ... graceful and clumsy ... old and young alike.  Old age and treachery make good partners with youth and skill.


As it turned out, the first annual BG and I Golf Open was a great deal of fun.  It forced many of us to actually get some exercise and have fun while doing it.  Sadly some of us were reminded that what was our golf game is no longer and that any thought of a return to those yesteryear's should be soon be forgotten.  So just enjoy the moment and enjoy your friends ... those things that are really the most important in our lives.

With hand firmly grasping the ibuprofen bottle ... I'm still livin' the dream.

Phil

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